Go.
Last but not least. That is how I've been thinking about
myself recently. And even though it sounds like I'm being a martyr, I don't
mean it that way at all. I just mean that since becoming a mother almost three
years ago, my life has become a lot less about, well, me, and more about the
two little girls that have become my shadows. They are more than just my
shadows though. They are also my light and my purpose, my frustration and my
joy. My every-waking-moment and my thoughts when I'm in bed and thinking about
doing it all again tomorrow.
At some point I realized I was coming in last. Not losing, just coming in last on the long list of priorities that fill the pages of my day planner. I was craving a creative outlet, which is a little interesting considering I never done something more literally creative than conceive, bear and tend to two gorgeous little girls. But something creative just for me. Something all my own. So I've been playing with my camera more and blogging more and writing in my journal more. It seemed larger creative pursuits were a little beyond the scope of my time-restraints. It seems all I do for me has to happen after the girls are in bed. Or while they are watching the iPad as I furiously type these words. But I think that is why I like this so much. Maybe I have found a new creative outlet. Because I have five minutes every Friday, or at least I can create five minutes while PBS kids plays in the background. For five minutes I will not be last, because I know I am worth more than the least.
Stop.
7 comments:
I really like this. We do often come in "last" as mothers. Glad you are making time to create! And welcome to FMF!
Welcome to FMF! So glad you found us. I can SO relate to your post. I have 3 boys ages 4 and under, so me time is often last, if it happens at all. But I'm slowly learning that taking time to connect with God and others to be filled up and encouraged is as important as folding laundry, making dinner, and building another blanket fort. So keep putting those precious girls first while still finding ways big or small to nurture YOU!
Blessings,
Becky
welcome to FMF. its a great place to write and be inspired and meet such awesome people who also write. I love the diversity of the answers every week even though we write from the same prompt. I am glad that God gave the idea to lisa-jo and we are able to participate. So glad that you could take some time to have some special time for you...hope you are able to join every week. It is a breathe of fresh air for me usually.
Good first fmf post!
I love this... and I can relate to nearly every word (except my two little people are boys ;) ) yes, keep doing something for yourself - we need it!!
Beautifully said. It's true that as a mom you are last and there is the great balance of losing yourself in the service of others while not loosing it completely. Kudos to you on finding ways to have an outlet. I'm still working on that one...
Hi Lauren,
I want to read more about your writing. Are you working on a fun project--a story, a book?
Take Care,
Amy
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